Currently {11}

Thinking about: How crazy we are to want to be parents. To willingly put our hearts out there and to have them so vulnerable and exposed. It was Ted's birthday this weekend, which was so wonderful, but it was also a special day for a very dear friend. My friend lost her sweet one year old son 8 1/2 months ago. I can't even express the sorrow that we still feel when we think of sweet Bradley. Being a parent is the hardest thing I've ever done, yet her experience as a parent has been a million times harder. We have to put so much trust and faith in our God, and yet we know and sadly are reminded that these sweet little souls are on loan to us. Bradley reminds me every day of this...to cherish every moment I have with Ted. I'm reminded to turn off the TV, put down the phone and close the computer and enjoy and laugh and play from the eyes of a one year old. My friend reminds me every day to never give up and never lose hope. God has a plan for our lives and as hard as it is, we must trust. Although we still don't understand why Bradley had to leave us so soon, we know of God's love and his healing. In the midst of their (continued) suffering, God has blessed them with a sweet little lady that will join them next month. It was so amazing to get to celebrate this new little life, all the while thinking of her big brother in Heaven and how he is looking over his family. It's hard to explain or even really comprehend, but I know this new little life will bring so much light and joy and that she will have such a beautiful relationship with her sweet Bradley in Heaven. 

Listening to: Nothing really. I'm not one to try out new music so I really don't listen to much...not even on the radio.

Watching: Anyone else still watch Grey's Anatomy? Dr. Burke is coming back this week and I cannot wait! Aside from the awkward musical episode (seriously it's like a train wreck...I can't not watch) of Grey's Anatomy, I have been a big fan and Dr. Burke was one of my orig faves...can't wait!

(Re)Reading: The Help. I love this book and in order to put an end to my recent problems with illiteracy I decided I should reread and an old faithful that I know I love. It is definitely a book I could reread a dozen times. Love it.

Thankful for: Wonderful friends and family who helped celebrate Ted's first birthday! We had a wonderful party at a train park. Even though it was quite blustery, it was so much fun! I love seeing how social Ted is and just how much he enjoys the simplest things. It really puts things into perspective. We are surrounded by so much "stuff" and more than anything Ted loves being around other people...and playing with paper or a rock. ;-) I love this little man so much and I am in awe of the fact that I get to be his mom. I have never felt more blessed or privileged or truly unworthy of anything else in my whole life. Every night when we put him to bed, I thank God for another day, tell him how much I love him and ask Jesus to bless my sweet boy. The greatest gift ever.