Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Currently {2}

Thinking about: How I should be cleaning my kitchen instead of blogging...

Reading: This and this. As we get closer to the idea and possibility of another baby, anxiety seems to set in regarding childbirth. My childbirth experience was less than my ideal. Don't get me wrong, I know that the most important thing is that Ted and myself are healthy. And thankfully, there were no serious complications. But, when you spent nine months preparing yourself not just for a vaginal birth, but a natural birth, it's a little heartbreaking to see all that preparation go straight out the door and straight into surgery without a chance to truly process what is happening. Nine months later and I still get emotional remembering how it all transpired. I think about what if's...what if I had changed doctors earlier?  What if I had a doula? What if we hadn't gone to the hospital so soon?  Again, I know what's most important, but after 45 hours of labor, serious sleep exhaustion, very raw emotional state and feeling like you have no choice anymore, it's hard to just get over it. If we have to have another c-section, I want to be better prepared and have a plan for both a natural birth or c-section.

Listening to: I don't really listen to music regularly. In the car, I listen to talk radio or Dave, I'm not 64 years old. On Friday night, Jason and I had an impromptu game night with Scrabble, wine and some Pandora. It was fabulous! Jason has been getting into Springsteen after seeing him on Jimmy Fallon.

Watching: Speaking of Jimmy Fallon...I adore him. Thank goodness for Hulu! We usually catch up on Jimmy Fallon every few days. He is so stinkin' funny! I hope he's still "Jimmy" when he moves to the Tonight Show. 

Also, still watching Sister Wives. I know, I's ridiculous, but I can't help it. I just watched one of the wives give birth at home and...I was B-A-W-L-I-N-G. Seriously, tears down my face. Not just the show that's ridiculous, I. AM. TOO. 

Thankful for: Beautiful weather. I know I talk about missing Iowa a lot, but I honestly do not miss it right now. I don't know if I could handle the bone-chilling temps they are facing in the midwest. It's been way below average in most of the country. I am extremely thankful to be in an area that is above average right now. Ted and I took a little 3 mile jog/walk yesterday and it was so wonderful!

And...this sweet boy is NINE MONTHS OLD! Every single day I am thankful for him. It is so amazing to watch him grow and see him learn new things every day. I love watching him play, seeing his face light up when his dad comes home and exploring our whole house...a million times a day. Pure, sweet bliss.


  1. What a cutie! Hope your next birth is all you hope it to be!

  2. Just followed your link on the Catholic Women blogging network!
    I have the same anxiety when it comes to future pregnancies and childbirth myself. I had an unplanned/emergency c-section this past June with our first child. I am constantly second guessing everything that led up to it. How I could have prevented it, if I had the right medical team, etc... It's almost exhausting. I want a large family if God is willing but now I have this fear about future pregnancies. I hope to learn more and be prepared next time around. Thanks for posting those links!

    1. Thanks so much for the comment! Motherhood bonds us all, but those of us who have csections have a different bond :) I am definitely hoping for a baby whenever baby #2 comes around, but if I do need another csection, I think I will be more prepared :)